Short hiatus

Hi there. I still have a lot to share with you from my European escapades (I have only shared half of my adventures), but the last few weeks have been a doozy. 

This time of year is always rough. For me, the holidays means family time. I love my family here, but I miss my parents and my brothers. We may not celebrate with turkey dinners, decorate trees, or exchange presents, but I miss the time we spend together. There is nothing like chatting, making fun of each other, yelling at one another, or telling stories about the trouble we used to get into when our parents weren't looking.

I went back to work after a much needed break. Unfortunately, things are right back to where I left them. Someone asked me how I was doing, being back and all. I said to them, "I've worked 7 full days, and I've skipped lunch 5 of those days." It is nice to know that I am needed, I suppose.

At the same time, I was diagnosed with being "mildly positive for rheumatoid arthritis". I say that in quotations because I am unsure as to how one can test mildly positive. I thought it was a black and white thing, you know, either you have it or you don't. Anyways, the doctors think that I am in the very early stages of rheumatoid arthritis and that with treatment, it may never develop into the full blown thing. One can only hope (and pop pills like no other).

So you are probably wondering what caused me to seek out a specialist in the first place. It all started with a swollen knuckle on my right hand and only my first finger. The finger that I mouse click with. The finger that I push the shutter button with. The hand that I do all my crafting and baking with. I didn't think anything of it at first. But the swelling, stiffness, and tenderness went from weeks to months. 

(early stage of rheumatoid showing swollen knuckles - source)

I have seen the symptoms of rheumatoid first hand. My my mother has RA. She was diagnosed in her mid-30's. It is a rare autoimmune disease, but is thought to have some hereditary traits. I know as well as any specialists that the symptoms show up in generalized areas (i.e., all knuckles in the hand) AND is symmetric, affecting the left and right side equally. It would be absurd that I have a localized case, right? That's what I thought. That's what the doctor thought. Guess we were both wrong. 

It is a double edge sword. I am glad that I had an answer almost immediately. I am thankful that I did not have to see a primary care physician who probably would have thought that I was nut job and just told me to take anti-inflammatory meds. I am grateful that I did not have to go through rounds and rounds of testing without receiving a diagnosis until it became the full blown thing. But knowing also sucks. There are moments where I will look down at my finger and be unable to create a completely tight fist. I fight back the tears and tell myself that I can beat this. I have overcome much worse. I WILL beat this.